Steven Kalas is the author of “Human Matters: Wise and Witty Counsel on Relationships, Parenting, Grief and Doing the Right Thing” (Stephens Press).
Links provided below are for articles written from Jan 2015 – March 2020
2020
03/06/2020 Post Marital Dating Rules
02/25/2020 Divorce is hell … but
02/19/2020 Meet Triumph and Disaster two Impostors, just the same
02/12/2020 Worst Shaolin Priest Ever
02/05/2020 It’s Not All About Us
01/29/2020 Spousal Abuse Question
01/22/2020 Justice is Not Revenge
01/15/2020 Contemplating ‘Sophie’s Choice’
01/08/2020 Go … Do … Redeem your Past
01/012020 Experiences Top Possessions
2019
12/26/2019 Still Transfixed by the Crèche Scene
12/18/2019 Childbirth: Expecting the Unexpected
12/11/2019 How do Human Beings come to Feel Worthwhile?
12/04/2019 Advice on Grieving During the Holidays – Sparks
11/20/2019 When Being ‘Mean’ Helps
11/13/2019 Dreams I’m Ready to Chase
11/06/2019 Deep Love in Blended Family
10/30/2019 Justice Matters but Redemption Matters More
10/02/2019 I’m Disappointed in You’
09/25/2019 What We Don’t Say at the End
09/18/2019 It Was the Best I Could Do
08/28/2019 Remember the Fable of ‘The Fox and The Lion’
08/21/2019 The Sands of Love
08/14/2019 Oh, That Alien Feeling Called Love
08/07/2019 When is a Complaint Legitimate?
07/31/2019 The Good/Bad Side of Religious Guilt
07/24/2019 Admire, Behold and See Your Children
07/17/2019 Trust: You Don’t Learn, You Decide
07/12/2019 Manhood Stands for Itself
07/09/2019 Healing a marriage is 50/50 work
06/26/2019 Learn to say, I take it back
06/19/2019 The world needs good fathers
06/17/2019 Oh, those ‘little’ wisdom books
6/08/2019 ‘Blade Runner’ most brilliant of the dystopia films
05/29/2019 You can’t not have faith
05/22/2019 It is not a flaw to need
05/22/2019 Old sayings that are so untrue
05/08/2019 Yes, you can love more
05/01/2019 Are you gonna call it in?
04/24/2019 A good life is a balanced life
04/17/2019 My friends are blind and lame
04/10/2019 God talks to you? Really?
04/03/2019 Building wings while you fall
03/29/2019 Action makes words credible
03/21/2019 Forgiveness and being forgiven
03/13/2019 In the presence of evil
03/07/2019 Getting smaller; less judgemental
02/27/2019 Internet’s culture of voyeurism
02/22/2019 Adventures in human discovery
02/13/2019 Dealing with ‘The Addict’
02/07/2019 Finding true love requires two questions
01/31/2019 I don’t tell couples to divorce, but…
01/24/2019 In death – each to their own
01/17/2019 The great mystery: Change just happens
01/10/2019 Like piranha, we attack weakness
01/02/2019 The Powerful Pool of Nostagia
2018
12/19/2018 The Pool Table of Life
12/12/2018 The Stranger Things in a Marriage
12/05/2018 Nike Therapy: Just Do it’
11/28/2018 Children Need to Be Admired
11/21/2018 When Kids Use ‘Bad’ Words
11/13/2018 Standing by Your Word
11/09/2018 I’m trying to forgive, but how?
10/31/2018 Saying ‘Enough’ Begins Change
10/23/2018 Don’t Tread on Me
10/17/2018 Does Your Love Show?
10/10/2018 Are You My Mother? No, and Hell No – Sparks
10/02/2018 Two Kinds of Shame
9/26/2018 Redemption Is Everyman’s Story
9/19/2018 Sorry, Anonymous Doesn’t Cut It
9/12/2018 Of Real Marriage and Divorce
8/28/2018 Parents, Children and Our Flaws
8/21/2018 Exclusive Sex Is the Best Sex
8/14/2018 You Don’t Have to Die to Go to Hell
8/4/2018 Tips on Raising that ‘Devil Daughter’
7/31/2018 Learning to Control Your Wake
7/24/2018 The Dance of Cynicism and Skeptism
7/17/2018 Know Your Limits, Then Reach for the Skies
7/3/2018 The Real Marriage Vows
6/25/2018 The Quintessential Freudian Slip
6/19/2018 Humor: The Best Medicine
5/31/2018 Ahh, the Joys of Disneyland
5/24/2018 Meet the Acronym ‘SOBER’
5/16/2018 Mother’s Day Is the Worst? What’s up with That?
5/11/2018 If You Want to Change Your Life Change Your Questions
4/28/2018 ‘No, I Am Far from Being Ok’
4/13/2018 Live Well and Free
4/14/2018 Family Bonds That Enslave Us
4/09/2018 Live Well and Free
3/30/2018 In Relationships, Accountability Matters
3/24/2018 Warriors and Punks
3/17/2018 Not Everyone Needs a Medical Label
2/27/2018 Authenticity Requires Your Self
2/20/2018 Advice on Watching Your Teen
2/18/2018 Love Is a Happening, Not a Decision
2/11/2017 Thinking about Injustice
2/5/2018 Modern Masculine Struggle
1/27/2018 Strive More for Truth Than Honesty
1/20/2018 Men Can’t Cry; Women Can’t Get Angry
1/14/2018 Morality Aside: Porn Is Ridiculous
1/6/2018 Yes, You Can Sense Impending Awareness
1/1/2018 Taking Inventory of Your Cupboard
2017
12/17/2017 Babies Change Everything
12/8/2017 ‘You Need to Get You a Mexican’
12/2/2017 ‘I Love You, and I’ll Never Leave You’
11/25/2017 ‘Honest Hallmark’ Greeting Cards
11/18/2017 Who Wants to Die Alone?
11/13/2017 Men: Never Lose the Joy of the Boy Within
11/7/2017 Divorce Alters Kid’s View of ‘Mom’Ndadness’
10/27/2017 When the Spouse Disappears from the Marriage
10/16/2017 A Son’s Text: ‘I’m Alive so Far’
10/5/2017 Hey, Kaepernick, Let’s Have a Beer
9/20/2017 Stages of A Loving Relationship
9/7/2017 Know Your Limits and Be Free
8/24/2017 Mean People Suck the Joy Out of Being
8/11/2017 Reaction is Revenge; Action is Justice
8/6/2017 There’s no Escape Plan in Love
7/30/2017 Great love? Stare down your fears
7/22/2017 Rules for lovers who text
7/7/2017 OK girls, meet your Gravitas
6/23/2017 Vulgarity Won’t Make America Great
6/16/2017 Listen up, guys, get a load of Sophia
6/3/2017 Don’t kid yourself: Divorce is forever
5/25/2017 Finding healthy soothing techniques
5/18/2017 Imagine interaction in pure innocence
5/11/2017 ‘My, what big eyes you have’
5/4/2017 Regression is common and treatable
4/30/2017 ‘Yes, I’m giving you an ultimatum’
4/21/2017 Jumping headfirst into the future
4/13/2017 Harrowing journey of truth, beauty and selfhood
4/7/2017 ‘Take a breath and freakin’ forgive me’
3/25/2017 Sadly, some fear racial healing
3/16/2017 Ahh, living the imperfect life
3/9/2017 True fidelity isn’t only about sex
3/4/2017 Redemption or bitterness? Choose redemption
2/24/2017 If it’s not one thing, it’s your mother
2/17/2017 Kelly Ann Conway: The Princess of pivot
2/10/2017 The intimacy of living whole
2/2/2017 We Long for Close Relationships
1/19/2017 The Moment I Became a Grandfather
1/6/2017 The Horror of ‘The Blog Age’
2016
12/22/2016 Make No Mistake: Evil is Real
12/16/2016 Highest Calling: Standing Up to Evil
12/10/2016 Women and beauty: It’s complicated
11/30/2016 The Girl Questions…the Guy Brain
11/24/2016 The Holidays: Perfect Storm for Those Who Grieve
11/16/2016 Sorry, Mr. Trump, My Honor is Non-Negotiable
11/10/2016 Story of a boy hit by a teacher
11/5/2016 Laughter and Globetrotters: Times changing
10/27/2016 In Gliding I Become Utterly Myself
10/21/2016 Trump talk: I don’t have friends like that
10/15/2016 The Healthy Journey of Leaving Home
10/8/2016 You Can’t Teach a Pig to Sing
10/2/2016 Yoga is Worship – it Crucifies You
9/24/2016 Is Sex Key to Winning a Man?
9/22/2016 N.W. in San Rafael asks must I have sex to compete?
9/15/2016 Empathy’s dark cousin – sadism
9/2/2016 Nurturing the Gift of Empathy
8/24/2016 The making of a good cop
8/19/2016 Duplicity Creeps Me Out – in Politics and Marriage
8/13/2016 Raising the Dreaded Teenager
8/6/2016 Part 2 on Surviving Adultery: Assemble a Circle of Support
8/1/2016 How Marriage Survives an Affair
7/19/2016 The disconnect of a modern homemaker
7/13/2016 Trust your gut – if your gut is trustworthy
7/6/2016 Selfless love requires self respect
2015
10/26/2015 Ego, like time, just slips away
10/17/2015 When your spouse is unhappy, ask why
10/4/2015 Doing the right thing matters more than the reason why
9/27/2015 ‘Stitching together’ should be our goal
9/19/2015 Step back, let kids solve own problems
9/13/2015 The Parent Esteem Apocalypse is upon us
8/30/2015 History deserves honest retelling
8/25/2015 We can’t help but judge book covers
8/25/2015 You have got to laugh or cry
8/10/2015 Friendship can continue after love ends
8/5/2015 Understand the motive behind a lie
7/24/2015 Flag debate rages in readers’ responses
7/17/2015 Time for the naive to wake up to symbolism of Confederate flag
7/12/2015 Celebrities can lift us up and let us down
7/5/2015 Learning to hurt so that we don’t harm
6/28/2015 Love is the simple measure of life
6/21/2015 It’s hard work to have a good marriage
6/14/2015 Fatherhood is its own reward
6/7/2015 Notions of male, female far from archaic
5/31/2015 Marriage exposes us, good and bad
5/24/2015 It’ll take more than a bubble bath to cure your stress
5/17/2015 A time to say goodbye to dreams
5/10/2015 Hero or abuser? Neither
5/3/2015 Being a good parent is tough
4/26/2015 Thriving marriages a gift to all
4/19/2015 Last week’s column was not about Larry’s Meats, at all, got it?
4/11/2015 Commerce holds upper hand in debate on religious freedom
4/5/2015 Darkness happens; we can opt for light
3/28/2015 Mothers help sons by setting boundaries for themselves
3/21/2015 People with disabilities deserve empathy, not shock
3/14/2015 Bonds that untie, moment by barely noticeable moment
3/7/2015 Yes, Virginia, there is an Easter bunny
2/28/2015 No gray of any shade: Great sex isn’t narcissistic conscription
2/21/2015 As Euclid reasoned, something is … or it isn’t
2/15/2015 Martyred bishop, randy birds and Valentine’s Day
2/7/2015 Managing relationships sometimes necessary
2/2/2015 If courtship’s still fragile, don’t involve the children
1/25/2015 Freedom of speech comes with responsibility
1/18/2015 Raising kids’ emotional security with alchemy, empathy
1/12/2015 The fault’s not in the stars, but the brain chemistry
1/12/2015 Excuse me a minute while I recombobulate …